A lot of marriages may end in a final blaze of glory worthy of a Hollywood rom-com but most do not. Most marriages fall apart due to the slow accumulation of taking your partner for granted, acting contemptuously or losing interest. Unfortunately, the only way to stave this off is by taking each day in stride – there are no magical fixes.
Think expansively about “contempt.” It can be small like rolling your eyes or dismissing your partner’s opinion. It can be big like insulting them in front of company or undermining them at work. Most people do not intend to take their partner for granted or act contemptuously, it happens over time. Both of you may not even realize it. But it is important to remember that these small actions hurt your partner and that these small hurts can build up over time.
These small actions tell your partner that you don’t take them seriously. In this particular atmosphere, it is nearly impossible to resolve an issue. Generally, these actions result from a long build-up of simmering negative attitudes. Usually, they originate from a perceived position of authority. The instant you begin losing respect for one another is the moment your marriage starts failing.
If you are considering divorce then you may want to sit down with a family law attorney. An attorney can go over your marriage and help you determine the best course for you. Divorce carries a finality to it that a lot of people may not appreciate until they are in it. This is a big decision and it deserves to be carefully considered. Don’t think that you need to rush anything or jump into a decision. Trust your instincts and the advice of your attorney.